Saturday, January 10, 2009

Cemetery news

As i mentioned the other day, i could do some meditation practice on a cemetary, or better said -crematory during last week. Sometimes other monks came to do some walking and a moviestar practiced there, i heard. :o)
It is a nice quiet place, surrounded by trees, view over a nice vally with sunset behind a mountain. A "veranda" for visitors, a cemented path to the fireplace and the fireplace. a 4 side pyramid like building with stairways on three sides leading to a platform with a place big enoug to burn the dead corpses. on the fourth side, the one without stairway ashes and rest of bones were broomed down to the ground and builded a pile there.
Meditation there was peaceful and quiet.
Nuns are not allowed to stay alone at a cemetery at night and so i stayed only until after sunset. In earlier days nuns probably were often raped or freeked out on cemetaries, i guess.
Well, it was, indeed, a bit spooky at first. But never scary, though.
The platform of the fireplace was perfect for sitting meditation. And always empty, non of the monks - if one was present - seem to dare to sit up there.
After a good start with highly concentrated walking meditation i sat down on the platform. Suddenly i felt the presece of an other being. A moanful old man who died without having eased a fight with family sat down to my right and lamented. Than a young woman with her baby came, she was so unendless upset having died together with her child.
You are dead, i said, you have to go into the white light and try to be reborne as human. Don't get lost on the way. I than said: seeing, seeing, talking, talking, noted the rising and falling of the abdomen. than another one came and tried to settle and fix himself in my body.
You can't do that, i thought, you are as much illusion as i am. i had to laugh. [noted laughing] You do not have self nor do i, so why try to cling on something, it is useless. with every try, we get stronger bound by the strings of suffering. So let go. let go.
Rising, falling, ...

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

You are so brave for not fearing the ghosts. I have a lot of admiration and respect for your decision to be a nun. It's not an easy life. Probably only 1 in 100,000 will make such a decision. It is a very noble cause and therefore I have a lot of respect for you. I sincerely wish you good health and a sound mind so you will always be able to practice dharma.